Bluntly Put

Posted On January 10, 2008

Filed under Confession

Comments Dropped 6 responses

I made someone cry today.

It wasn’t intentional but I think it was almost unavoidable, given the situation.

It’s tough, relationships. I really try not to take the passive-aggressive route. I prefer to actually communicate with someone if there’s a problem. I once told a former boss that he’d never hear about a problem I had with him from anyone other than me. I think it’s only fair to take an issue to the person with whom you have the problem. Just blathering on about it to any old person who’ll listen doesn’t do much to fix it, in my estimation.

Most of the time, I think it works. Sometimes, not so much. I can think of at least one occasion, fairly recently, that doing so has actually led me to close a door completely on an already tenuous relationship. Sad? Maybe. Unavoidable? Certainly.

I like to play tough but it’s actually pretty easy to hurt my feelings. (Honey can attest to this.) And that’s pretty much what was at the root of this latest situation. The opportunity arose today to share my feelings and I took it. I explained my perspective, included some specifics and felt the weight lift off me. Tears ensued on the other end, but I think we’re on the road to healing. I’m glad because I really care about this person and want to work it out.

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6 Responses to “Bluntly Put”

  1. Cathy

    Blunt or direct? I suppose you could do both. I prefer being direct, and even blunt, but most people seem to prefer neither. I hope it works out.

  2. alittlemoore

    I am sorry your feelings were hurt. I know you have a rational and thoughtful soul. I am sure your intentions were pure. I hope that you and your friend are on the mend now.

  3. Amber

    I am so like this too. I like to confront things rather than just pretend everything is fine. I hope everything works out!

  4. Melissa Garrett

    UGH! I hate any sort of confrontation (usually it’s me doing the crying). This is something on which I am trying to work. Like you said, it does no one any good to hide your problems if they are important enough to warrant resolution.

  5. sadira

    Oh, it’s hard sometimes to “come clean” with the way you feel…I struggle with it a lot. But…if I don’t, I usually take it out on the other person in passive aggressive ways until I finally tell them what I’m feeling…but, it’s always worth it in the end, no matter what happens in the relationship…those things need to be done…cudos for your courage!!

  6. Erica

    I hate confrontation but I also know that a relationship can’t go deeper if the little things annoy me. Better to get it out then hold it in. And thats one of the 10803 reasons why we’re friends. 😉

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